Sunday, March 10, 2013

What We Desire Vs. What We Deserve

The above subject, for whatever cosmic reason has been circling around my ever tangential thoughts lately. I look at all the things I want out of life, all of my deepest desires, and I wonder if I really deserve them. I wonder if my desires are congruous with my actions. Am I setting grandiose goals without creating a means by which I can accomplish them? Am I just hoping my little heart out, without getting my knees scuffed and my elbows dirty? These are some questions that have been weighing on me, and I wonder if my personal moments of introspection can't resonate with others. So, let's talk about courtship. We have all waited for this subject to surface. Who among us (being men) doesn't want that elusive prize? Maybe we do not all want the quote on quote trophy wife, but who doesn't think they deserve an amazing quasi-perfect girl with fantastic features, impeccable personality and stunning social skills? We all do. My question is, are we doing everything in our power (as men) to be that potential counterpart for someone? Are we striving omnivorously to improve ourselves physically, mentally, and spiritually? If I for instance want a future spouse who is in unbelievable shape, and incapable of ever gaining weight in the future, am I likewise diligent in maintaining those same bodily characteristics myself? If superficiality in terms of longevity is that important, then it better go both ways. What about something more important...What if I desire a future mate that will be the perfect mother, and spiritual compass for my children? Do I really deserve such a wonderful specimen if I am not working insatiably to achieve a similar mantel of paternal greatness and spiritual prowess while I am single? These are questions that we should all ask ourselves. Because I am confident that only a very small percentage of the population thinks they deserve something sub-par. Few people imagine their future wife or husband to be not much more than the dregs of society. So, no matter what putative social or economic class we find ourselves in, should we not strive for the best? Should we not procure the choicest of people to surround ourselves with? Should we not aspire to excel in whatever endeavor we come across? We absolutely should. Let us save mediocrity for another day. Let us dominate today. But furthermore, let's get what we deserve by deserving it. If you want a "10", be a ten. If you want to be rich, work like someone who deserves to be rich. If you want something special in your life, be something special. Maybe this sounds like one man's convoluted diatribe about karma. But saying be good and you will receive good is oversimplifying my message. I am a true believer in the power of optimism, but success is more than just thrusting positivism out into the universe. It is about getting up and doing. It is about an epic attitude that generates unreal results. The author and pastor Charles Swindoll perhaps articulated it best:

 "The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company... a church... a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past... we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude... I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it.

And so it is with you... we are in charge of our attitudes."